Thursday, January 21, 2010


People who are into spanking seem to have many implements in their collections. My husband Evan has given me several implements over the years. My favorites are two heavy hardwood hand-size paddles, about 1/2" thick each. These paddles are beautiful pieces of hardwood, each cut into a lovely shape, with handles that are very comfortable to hold. I like them because they are pretty and easy to use. I can swing hard and hit exactly where I am aiming with these extremely easily. One of them fits snugly in my purse, and I carry it with me at all times. I have used this paddle on Evan in unusual locations at unusual times, but not too often. The fact that he knows that I have it with me keeps him well-behaved. I have also brought it out at parties a couple of times, showing it to some mutual friends. I also told them what it was for. I am pretty sure that they believed me: I have a reputation for being very open about sexual matters, and everyone knows that I am the boss of Evan. I think it embarrassed Evan when I brought out the paddle in front of others, but he laughed it off, and pretended that it was just good fun on my part. That's ok with me. I let him do this if he is very embarrassed. But I will keep bringing it out. I like to keep him nervous: I enjoy embarrassing him. (And I know that deep down, he likes it too, even if it twists his stomach into knots at the time.)

(FYI, Evan got the paddles for me from . They are not cheap (around $30 each) but they have been worth it for me: much sturdier than even a nice wooden hairbrush, and the wood is gorgeous. I have never met the people at that website and I get no cut from them: this is just a genuine endorsement.)

Evan gave me both of these paddles about two or three years ago. I have a pretty good idea why I never got any more: these are more than adequate to do the job. (The time that I received these paddles was about the time that I started spanking more regularly.) I also have a lexan paddle, which is 3/8" thick, with holes in it. This is also easy to use (and similarly hard on Evan's behind), but it's not as pretty as my wooden paddles. And I have a paddle that Evan got from the Disciplinary Wives Club ( many years ago, which is a little bit bigger than the others, and has holes in it. This is like the lexan paddle: it's easy to use, but not as pretty as my two favorite paddles.

I also have some canes that Evan got me several years ago, and a couple of heavy straps. I really like the straps: they are beautiful leather. One has three tails, and the other has two. They are heavy: every stroke from these makes an obvious impact on Evan, because he yells loudly immediately after impact (which is satisfying to me). And they are relatively easy to use, too: I can aim fairly easily, and hit whichever spot I want (I have to cover both cheeks evenly, as I am sure you know).

I know many people out there are fascinated by canes, in part because of the long history of caning as punishment in school in England. Evan read a lot of English school stories, with lots of caning and birching for naughty boys and girls. I have heard some of these stories, and I appreciate the history, but I find the cane much harder to use than the other implements that I own. Maybe I don't have a quality cane: the ones I have are quite thin and whippy. I have two problems with using the cane: (1) I can't aim as well as I can with the other implements, and so sometimes I hit too low or too high; and (2) because I can't aim as well, I don't swing as hard as when I use other implements, and the effect is not as strong (I can tell because Evan doesn't cry out as much). So I don't generally use the cane very much, at least not yet. Some day, I will learn to wield one better than I do. I am sure someone will teach me to be better at it. I will happily take lessons with Evan's bottom as our target. Any takers? (Please don't volunteer your own bottom: I know lots of men want this, but that's not what I need. I already have a target.)

Another reason I prefer my paddles to other implements is that I like the over-the-knee position the best. It's a very intimate position, where I can lovingly hold Evan as I am spanking him. I very much like the close physical contact, even though his wiggling around sometimes hurts my legs. The strap and cane are not so easy to use otk. I know that there are otk canes, but the one I used was too light. My paddles make more of an impact, and leave lovely red marks.

I will close today with the last couple of stills from the first spanking video that I have posted. In the last still, I am giving Evan a friendly squeeze after he has got off my lap. I gave him a proper hug after that.

As a teaser for later, here is one picture from just prior to another spanking that Evan received. As you can see, Evan was semi-erect before that spanking started. I like to keep him in a state of sexual denial well before and after a spanking, so he is often hard before we start. I like to then spank the erection out of him: that is somehow very satisfying. I will post more stills from that spanking later.

Finally, I see that you seem to like the photos of me. Thanks for all the kind words. I will get Evan to take more photos of me holding my paddles, and then I will post those later.

Keep the comments coming! As always, I appreciate everything you say, even if it's just to say hello, and that you read the blog. It inspires me to write more when I read the comments that people leave and the emails that people send.

Jan 23: Response to comments:
Thanks to you all for all the comments. I appreciate them, as always.

Parivash: Sorry, but I am not putting up video clips. I am not a video editor, and I don't want to include the sound, because there are too many identifying cues in our voices. It's too bad, because the sound is perhaps the best part, as far as I am concerned. Evan really yells at times when I am letting him have it. He is not a quiet one.

Jayne's Master: To become a follower, I think you just need a google account. Let me know your blog, and I may follow that one too. Good luck with it!

wailer: I am glad you like that Evan is wearing his socks. This is just how it happens for over-the-knee spankings for us. I like the pants completely off, because I like to see his legs. But there is no reason to take off his socks: he's going back to work soon after I get done with him. (As I said earlier, my spankings are not prelude to sex for us, even though they are exciting for both of us.)

beejay: I have not used a slipper on Evan. My slippers wouldn't bother him at all. I need a good hard paddle to make an impression (and it's easy with my paddles).

Anonymous 1: Thanks for the kind compliments. I will post more photos of myself in the future.

Anonymous 2 (wdspoone): Good luck with your DD relationship. If your partner needs a female friend for advice, send her to me.

Anonymous 3 (michael_michael): Thank you for your support.

Anonymous 4 (jm): Thanks to you too.

Anonymous 5 (Sue): Thanks, Sue. I am glad to see that there are at least a few women reading this. I would be delighted to hear from more.

spanked husband: It's always a pleasure to hear from you. Yes, I may give caning some more work in the future. But frankly, I like the way that I do things now just fine. I have my own way, which is very paddle-oriented. Some day I may change, but for now, I like paddling.

Anonymous 6 (Ardor): Welcome. I am glad to have you join me.


  1. Dear
    Thank you for your passage. I suggest you using corp riding (horse whip) for bad mistakes. It is very effective for him. I use this for my husband and very effectively. I wait for your video clip.
    Kiss you dear

  2. Jayne's MasterJanuary 22, 2010 at 5:38 AM

    Hi Guys,
    Love the blog and would like to follow it but I cant seem to find out how to become a 'follower'. We have just started a similar blog ourselves and this is totally new for us (late starters in our mid forties).
    Anyway, keep up this great site and we hope to be able to find a way to become a follower!
    Jayne's Master.

  3. One thing I noticed is that Evan still has his socks on. It might sound silly, but that's a nice touch.

    For some reason, being bare below the waist feels more naked than being totally undressed. It's a reminder that you're undressed to be punished.

    The socks still on just enhance that.

  4. hi too all, you are like my wife she loves the paddles we have many and the strap is the other ones she likes to uses a lot too,
    for us she like to put cream on my butt before a spanking it may be baby oil, hand cream, and if i am very bad icy hot, it holds the heat in and the sting last longer

  5. Hi There

    Love your blog, thanks for sharing it with us....have you ever thought of using one of your slippers on Ewan?

    Ben (UK)

  6. Truly, I love this blog and want to encourage you in every way. Your photo in pink sweater and light skirt is compelling and powerful, the visual representation of that delicious and nerve-wracking pre-disciplinary moment. This photo draws me into the scene.

    Thanks, too, for comments on your favorite paddles. I have always felt that a loving wife, with a small but effective paddle in her purse, would be among the greatest gifts that women could give to society.

  7. Hi Ms.Deirdre - I love your blog. I checked it out after you had posted a link to it in a comment on my yahoo group - - I was delighted to read your overview of the DD relationship you incorporate in your marriage. I have a long time female friend whom I met on my yahoo group well over 10 years ago, we have had 100's of long involved talks about DD and when circumstances have allowed, we have gotten together and she has disciplined me. We eventually plan to join up for good when circumstances allow and I already know through our communication that it will be very simmilar to the relationship you now enjoy. I loved the statement you made that Evan "loved the idea of spanking but hated the actual reality of it"...I have never heard it put better for those of us that are spanked by strong women such as yourself. Finally, I would like to agree with wailer above, I somehow feel more naked when I am not totally naked! For me it is more mentally devastating to not only still have my socks on but to also have my underpants on only really does have alot to do with the fact that I know why I am in this state of undress.....I am about to be severely spanked with similar paddles as yours which I have made. I am going to post pictures on the yahoo group now of some of the implements we have and ones that are used. Thanksfor taking the time to post this blog ma'am. - wdspoone

  8. Deirdre,

    It sounds like you and Evan are a very lucky couple indeed. It's enjoyable reading about your discipline activities.


  9. Wdspoone's comment is so true. Something that is deeply embarassing is to be partially clothed,wearing a shirt but with slacks/shorts pulled down and bottom bared for punishment. For reasons not fully thought out, the emotional vulnerabilty is so much higher than when I am nude.

    Again, grateful for the blog; anxiously await future posts.


  10. Dierdre,

    I agree with you on the paddle being best. My husband was spanked otk with a paddle on his bare bottom as a boy by his stepmom and we both agree this is the most effective way for me to spank him.


  11. Caning ability, like everything else, comes with practice. You might try covering his lower back, and upper legs so that if you strike them it won't hurt. Then you can swing away just as hard as you like.

  12. Saw your post in Fetlife and came over to check you out. I enjoyed reading it I'll be back for more :-)

    Femdom, CFNM & NIP stories

  13. Thanks to you all for all the comments. I appreciate them, as always. I put my responses in the bottom of the post.


  14. Deirdre,

    I am glad you enjoyed my post. One day when I have time, I'll write more about our experiences, but as a proverbial soccer mom with two boys I am so busy! Basically my husband Rich just has this craving for discipline, and I have no problem giving it to him.


  15. Hi Deirdre & Evan,

    I agree with you OTK with paddle is the best and most effective of all. I know many people love the cane, but especially for husband and wife OTK is much more intimate and personal yet effective. Your view of discipline very much mirrors mine, I like OTK, I like the fact that you spank him hard and spank any erection out of him. I like it then when the spanking is over you give him a loving squeeze, and hug. I like the fact that you maintain complete control over him through out the discipline, but when it is over you are loving, but do not allow pleasure to be part of his discipline. If you get pleasure from it (and I suspect you do) so much the better. Keep up the good work, and yes I do love seeing more pics of you disciplining your man :)

    Your biggest fan,

  16. ....from a recipients point of view OTK is definatley the most satisfying position from which to make amends, you offer your bottom up in a sacrificial way that you don't quite do bending over (as for the cane), have an intimate contact with your spanker, and get to kick your legs when it starts to hurt (I find this helps!!) I've never seen the fasciantion with canes myself....and purpose made paddles are all well and good but don't underestimate the effectivness of a good Hairbrush, and you can leave it out on the dressing table!!


  17. Hello Deidre,

    I noticed your "reply" to a comment you thought I had left. (That was actually a fellow named "a spanked husband" . . . . not me.) As you can see, I do drop in on your blog fairly often, but I would never suggest you start caning Evan, lol.


  18. Just found your blog... Keep up the good work!

    You mention having a 3/4" thick lexan paddle. That sounds VERY thick, where did you get that?

    We too seem to like the wooden paddles, they are very effective. We have a hairbrush shaped oak paddle that's about 3/4" thick and it's VERY wicked, it can be used for moderate or severe pain.

    Rubber paddles can be wicked too, they seem to get a good 'bite' of skin.

    Most wicked OTK implement we have might have to be the bathbrush that I shortened to about 14" long, it can be used light for sting or heavy for a thud that might still be felt a few days later.

  19. Hi LDD-4-Me:

    I see that I was wrong about the thickness of my lexan paddle: it's only 3/8" thick (which is definitely thick enough, anyway). I edited my post accordingly. Sorry for my confusion.