A shifting dynamic 2: the ear-pull as a way to bring about submission

Thank you all for your positive response to my last post.  Perhaps I have hit a nerve with many of you submissive men?  Do you all like the idea of your spouse pulling you by the ear when you are misbehaving?  Please answer in the comments section: I want to know what you all think.  I am happy to find out either way: yes or no.

Anyway, the ear-pull works wonders on Evan.  He can be in a foul mood, talking to me in a slightly condescending male way, and now bang, I grab his ear, and say, "Is that any way to talk to your wife?  I don't like it: stop it right now and apologize."  I am shocked to find out that this method *works* on him.  100% thus far: no signs of any rebellion when I grab his ear and twist a bit: no damage, but I make it hurt while I am talking to him.  He of course is much bigger and stronger than me, and he could easily pull away and stop me from doing this, but he allows this without any resistance at all.  This lets me know that I have found a weak point, and I now I plan to take advantage of it.  I can see how it flusters and confuses him: he stutters about being sorry, and then he apologizes, and I let go, and we go back to a more normal state.  I can see that he is strongly affected for a while after this.  It is amazing to see: this big, muscly guy, bent a little sideways, with my ear in his hand, listening intently to my instructions.  I have complete control over him like that, and it turns me on greatly.  More on this below.

For all you wives out there: if your man has said that he wants to be spanked, but then he doesn't obey you when you have a real conflict, I strongly suggest the ear pull.  It probably won't work all the time (what solution is ever perfect?), but so far so good for me.  In situations of true conflict, where Evan is genuinely annoyed over something in real life, the ear-pull has brought him around to good behavior in a matter of seconds.  I am not sure what's going on in his head when this happens, but he becomes a much better person to be around very quickly.

As I mentioned in my responses to some comments, I have already used the ear pull in public situations.  When Evan was acting up a little at the Home Depot the other day, I quickly grabbed his ear and told him to behave and be more respectful to me.  That quieted him down immediately, and he behaved right away, after apologizing.  I don't know if anyone saw, and I don't care.   I am not shy about wanting to be Evan's boss at home.  I am glad that he now wants it.  I am sure I will continue to do this not only in public, but also in front of our friends.  They already know that I am in charge (no secret there: I make it very obvious) so I don't think they will be surprised to see me grab his ear, and tell him to behave.  Probably the only people that I won't do this in front of are Evan's family, who don't really get his subservience to me.  To them, he is an alpha-male.  They don't get how he could do my bidding all the time. But that's ok: they don't have to understand, and I don't have to explain it to them, and neither does Evan.  We can be fine on our own.  I guess I also won't push my new-found control over Evan at his workplace: his bosses can think of him as an alpha-male there too, even though I know different.

In addition to working in normal life, the ear-pull has also worked at home to get Evan over my knee for a paddling, right when I wanted to give it to him, which surprised and elated me.  I had told him that I was going to paddle him last Thursday night, and he agreed.  He often agrees to this kind of a schedule in advance, even on the morning of the proposed event.  But when it comes to getting his pants down that evening, it hasn't always been easy to do.  He would back out, saying that we are both tired, and he is stressed and not in the mood etc., and I would then let him have his way, and let it go.  But not Thursday evening.  We had dinner with a friend of Evan's, and he didn't leave until late, maybe 11pm, and by that time we had shared 2 bottles of wine among the 3 of us.  I am pretty sure that Evan thought he was off the hook when his friend left: after we have a bit to drink, he has always been safe before.  But not on this night.  Once Evan's friend left, I told Evan to get his pants down and into the corner in the downstairs hallway.  I grabbed his ear and put him there, and held his ear until he dropped his pants, while he was standing in the corner.  I normally let Evan do all the cleaning up, but I was really turned on by his submission, so I left him there and told him to think about his behavior this past week, and whether he still deserved a paddling.  I then went to clean up in the kitchen.  I called out to him from the kitchen, asking him whether he was thinking about his behavior, and he responded "yes" quietly.  It was very exciting for me to have him there, pants down, in the corner, doing exactly as I demanded.  I cleaned up for a while, maybe ten minutes, then I took him upstairs for his paddling.  I would have him finish up the cleaning later.


When we arrived upstairs, I asked him if he had been a well-behaved boy this past week, and did he deserve a spanking?  He said that he thought he had been pretty well-behaved, and that he had done all that I had asked, when I asked.  I responded, yes, I agreed with that, but did that mean that he was well-behaved?  He said that he thought so, yes.  I responded that I disagreed.  He was not well behaved at all.  He had talked to me in a rude tone several times, so that I had had to grab his ear or hair and tell him off while this happened.  "Was that good behavior?" I asked.  "No," he agreed, "it wasn't."  It just wasn't.  "So now I am going to paddle you for this.  It's going to hurt, and you are going to deserve it.  But that will be good for you." He still had his pants down, so now I wanted him lying on the bed.  Once again, I grabbed his ear (the solution for everything these days), and dragged him to the bed and had him lie down.  I wanted to paddle him hard without him hurting my legs, which often happens when he squirms while he is lying over top of me.  I told him not to move while he was face down on the bed, or it would be worse.

Then I spanked him with my small heavy wooden purse-paddle (which I now have him call by name: "pursey").   I struck him hard maybe 20 times to start, whereupon he yelled out and complained, and started to roll over.  I told him to stay in position or it would be worse.  I gave him about 10 more hard smacks with this paddle, and he rolled out of position, and put his hands behind him to cover his bottom.  I warned him not to do this or it would be much worse: I had a plan, which I was going to enforce.  Eventually he got back in position, and I smacked him another 10 times or so, and he yelled a lot (what a baby!), rolled sideways, and covered his bottom with his hands.  "All right," I said, "I warned you."  Then I smacked his hands several times, pretty hard, while they protected his bottom.  Pursey the paddle is heavy: she is not to be trifled with.  That got his hands out of the way in a hurry.  And then I smacked the side of his thigh to get him back on his stomach: no more rolling sideways.  That really got his attention.  "Roll back in position," I commanded, "or it will just be worse."  He whimpered, and did what I asked.  I then told him that I was going to give him just 20 more smacks, but they would all be very hard.  If he stayed in position, that would be it: he would be done for the night.  But if he moved away, I would start over.  He made a hell of a racket during these 20, but he stayed in position for the 20.  I really laid on hard: I could tell that a bunch of these smacks were going to bruise him.  That's ok: he can take it.  He was naughty, and this is what he had coming.  He was wailing at the end, but he didn't squirm away too much, so I told him we were done with his paddling, and he had taken it well enough.  I would train him more later.  After prompting, he thanked me and hugged me close.

This was one time that he offered no coaching of me whatsoever: this was my doing, not his.  I think he is now getting what he deserves.

For my part, I was extremely turned on by his submissiveness.  So I had him get a pillow for his knees on the floor, and get to work on licking my pussy.  I came so fast: it was amazing.  It probably took him less than two minutes of his gentle licking on and around my clit to bring me off.  Wow.  I guess it had been a few days since I had last orgasmed, but this was fast.  After calming down a bit, I flipped over, and told him to fuck me deep from behind.  I love the feeling of his thick cock in me, especially from behind, my favorite position.  He hadn't come in a week or so, so I asked if he was close to coming.  He said no, he was safe yet.  I had him fuck me for a minute or two (not long!), and then I said that that was enough: I wanted to keep him hard for a few weeks yet (he still hasn't come yet, four days later (just getting started)), so I didn't want to risk letting him ejaculate that night.  I flipped back over on my back on the bed, and told him to get back to work, licking my pussy again.  It took a bit longer this time, but not much.  Evan later told me that I had come more quickly both the first and second time than he had ever remembered.  I agreed.  For his part, Evan was kneeling on the floor beside our bed, with a big erection, licking away, doing as he was told, for once.  What a turn on for both of us.  I sent him downstairs to clean the rest of the dishes in the kitchen, and then he came to bed with me.  I had him snuggle me from behind with his arms around me in a spooning position: my favorite! I could feel his big erection bobbing and poking me on my bottom.  No relief for you, Evan, not for a while yet.  We are going to try a milking month or two!  And you will listen to me, or I will grab your ear.  Then you will listen to me for sure.

I hope you have enjoyed this story.  It's 100% real life. Yes, I am sure you can tell that I am happy in our life together.

If you are a submissive man, then comment on my blog when you have read this story.  In honor of dominant women everywhere, do as I say.  I will happily grab your ear to make my point.  (If you are a dominant woman, then I would also of course appreciate your feedback, but I only ask you to do so as an equal, not as a dominant.)

Update: Tuesday, Sept 18.  Thank you for all the comments.  I will respond to them all below, very shortly.  Now I understand the way to get submissive men to comment: just tell them to do it.  Duh!  I should have realized that what works on Evan works on you guys.  It's taken me a while to get used to ordering Evan around, but it's easier all the time.  I am a fast learner.

Deirdre.

just getting started (again!).  that one really hurt!

it's so nice that my big man allows me to spank him otk for his misdeeds.

he could get up if he really wanted to, but deep down he knows he needs this.